Prometheus Part 2

So remember those plot hole I mentioned?  Yeah.  These guys touch on everyone of them.

WARNING!  THIS IS ENTIRELY SPOILER-IFIC!

Prometheus

So very recently a friend of mine got a job at the movie theatre.  From what I understand, the pay is kind of shit but everyone's pretty chill there overall.  However, one of the major perks: Free movies.  Provided we go with him we get to go see movies for free.

Pretty much.

So, this past Monday we went and saw Prometheus together.  I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but I'll be damned: this movie exceeded whatever expectations I wasn't expecting.

As a general synopsis for the plot: a bunch of scientists make a discovery at various archaeological digs around the world that all point to one grouping of planets.  These scientists all suit up, hop on a trillion dollar expedition to this planet in question, and low-and-behold: aliens.

The visual effects were stunningingly great, with minimal points of "well golly gee, I hope those animators were paid overtime!" as far as the CG goes, which sort of remains true to the original Alien series.

However: there are a few overall plot holes/blaringly "DUH" points to the story, which sort of detract from it.  I mean, it sort of has a whole bunch of every single trope imaginable to a space scenario such as: the gun-freak, the science nerd, the military bitch and the android.  I mean some of them are minor enough to ignore and just sit down and watch what's unfolding in front of you, but still...

Overall though I'd say it was a really freaking excellent movie.  If you have the opportunity to go see it: do so- you won't be horribly disappointed.

Adventures at Target Part 2

So...the people at Target generally scare me sometimes.  It's kind of a miracle that they've managed to survive in the world long enough to get to the point where they are now that they can "afford" a 50" LED television.  But even scarier is that fact that the managerial staff are somehow qualified to call themselves such sometimes.

Take for instance this scenario:

My department was starting to get a little busy, but nothing I couldn't handle.  A really cute girl had come up and asked me to sell her a camera, so I more than obliged.  I proceeded to sell up the cameras she was looking at, and overall started to make sure that she knew what she was purchasing (ie: what features it has and all that fun jazz).  Very suddenly my walkie goes off with a very pissy voice "ELECTRONICS YOU HAVE A CALL ON 34, SECOND REQUEST, CAN I GET A COPY?!"

Mind you I hadn't heard the first request, which was then confirmed by the guest I was assisting and confirmed again by the tech-installation guy.  Tech guy says to me "I got this," and picks up his own walkie "Tom's currently assisting a guest and is more than a little busy, can someone else get the freaking call?"

My manager jumps down the walkie's throat "If Tom's so busy he should be calling for backup, I'm sending someone back to electronics now".

The three of us stare at each other in bewilderment.  "I don't think he quite got the message..." the guest starts in.

I dash over to the phone, answer the inane "Do you have XYZ in stock?" and "Can you put that on hold until tomorrow?" questions they always seem privy to ask, and returned to the girl I was helping.

Nearly 10 minutes later "backup" arrived.  Really?  What if it had actually been an emergency?  What if I had a line of 20 people all wanting to be rung out for their crap at once?  What if they all wanted iPads, and me as a single human being couldn't handle them all at once?

But whatever, it's the thought that counts.

Backup then leaves, I sell her the camera, and we part ways.  Not 5 minutes later did a massive crowd appear.  "Can I get backup to electronics?  It's starting to really get swamped back here and could really use a hand."

Manager: "Copy that, great communication!  Alright team, let's remember to keep the communication up so we can really push guest experience!"

Silence.

Myself: "So uh...how about that backup?"

It literally took another 10 minutes for backup to arrive, which, by that time all of the other guests had already left or I had taken care of them.

A Bit of Bitching

Okay, I know I haven't posted in about a month and the last thing you want to read is something along the lines of "WAAAH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCHITY BITCH!" but I'm just going to go ahead and throw it out there:

If you want to live in America, learn to speak English.

It's just something that has been progressively pissing me off for the longest time.  Why is everything printed in both English and Spanish?  Where did the French writing on my box of cereal come from? 

If you're going to move to a country that doesn't speak your native language: at least make an effort to try and learn at least a small yet functional amount of it.  I mean, if I were going to move to Germany, I'd sure as hell try to learn functional bits of German.  I'm not saying that I'd try to make myself fluent in the language, but I'd try to learn just enough to make sure that I don't wind up in the red light district when I'm out shopping for cheese.

But I seriously cannot count the times in my experiences in retail that I've had to call over another employee just because "No speeek inglisch".  For serious?  For fucking serious?  You learned just enough English to let people know that you do not speak English in a really fractured and grammatically incorrect stereotypical statement? 

Mind: Blown

I'm sure this is going to get me a whole lot of hate mail and a whole lot of "How can you be so insensitive?" comments.  No.  Fuck that.  If you are capable of spending whatever wages you have earned (whether through legal labor or not) to purchase a 46" LED TV and give me the "How much cost does this?" and "No speak English" lines, then you are more than perfectly capable of going out and learning a little bit of whatever the native language is.  What gripes me more is that there have seriously been people who get pissy at me because I don't speak whatever language they speak.  Really?  You're going to "No speeek inglisch" at me and then give me attitude when I say "I'm sorry, I don't speak Spanish but let me find you someone who does"?  That's what really gets me. 

I get the whole "This country was founded as a melting pot of cultures and this is just the next step of the whole integration into the world process" bullshit whatever blah blah blah: but still.  I'm not saying "Drop your native language and speak English exclusively."  No.  Far from it.  Go ahead and speak with your brethren in whatever language you chose whether that language be Spanish, French, Chinese, Elvish...whatever.  I'm more so fed up with people going out into general society, not knowing a single word of the native language and expecting the world to cater to them. 

And now I've said my piece. 

In Memory- Karene Faul

I first met Karene Faul some time in 2005 when I went for my portfolio review as a high school senior trying to figure out what college to go to. 

When I first saw her I thought for sure that there was no way I was getting into Saint Rose.  Her eyes beamed down on me with a strong intensity and I knew that she was not going to pull any punches in her critiques.  We went into the review very quietly and listened to me very intently as I described my work, taking notes and offering bits of advice as it went on.  I was nervous as all hell.

When we finally got through my portfolio she gave me all sorts of constructive criticism, and then turn and stared me dead in the face with her intense eyes and asked "Why do you want to do art?"

I explained how it's always something that I've done and that I wanted to get better at it.  It is a part of me and to neglect it would be to ignore a part of my very soul.  Granted at the time I wasn't so fluently poetic about it, but I still went on about how I wanted to learn what I could in order to get better and to really produce the art that I wanted to make.

I saw a glimmer in her eyes for a brief second.  We continued talking for almost an hour about different artists (and at one point or another about how it could be applied to video games I do believe...) and at the end she told me that I was in.

She then led my parents and I on a personal tour of Picotte (the art building), but the whole time I was just in awe of how connected she was with the other students, referring to all of them by name no matter what department they were working in and asking them what they were working on.  I could tell she really cared about her students and their work.

Flash forward a few years to Screen Printing I and the less than stellar year I had with Karene.  I, being the 18 year old snotty self that was indestructible and could produce only perfection, vehemently refused any suggestions that she or any other faculty would make.  I wound up doing mediocre in the class as a whole, but it wasn't the grade that got me down as I had held onto believing for almost 2 more years: it was the fact that I felt like I had let Karene down.

It took me a while to realize this fact and made my silent apologies.  In retrospect, I probably should have made them more verbal, possibly put it down in writing a bit sooner.

Part of me feels like Karene always knew that I should have been a Studio Art major instead of a Graphic Design or Art Education major and kept trying to push me towards it in subtle ways.  Granted, to me at the time her "subtle ways" came across as instant hostility whenever she saw me and very terse criticisms of works in process...but sure enough: once I changed over to Studio she brightened up around me and the criticisms became constructive.

My superior senior year was a bit of a cluster-"effe" between deadlines not being met by certain individuals and classes that should have been taken years prior being crammed in at the last minute...(a whole other story that I shall not get into at this point): Karene was there for me every step of the way.
She called me up during the summer prior to help me plan out my remaining two semesters.  She filled out paperwork in March that should have been done in November and immediately had it processed, bypassing all the ludicrous red tape that colleges seem oh so fond of.  I could tell that she really wanted her students to succeed and wanted to give them every opportunity to do so.


It came as a shock today when I found out that she had taken very ill, and an even greater shock when a few hours later I had heard she passed away.  I wanted to write her a letter telling her all of this, but unfortunately time hasn't given me that opportunity. 


So this is for you Karene.  May you rest in peace knowing that you have touched the lives and hearts of hundreds of students: both artists and non-artists alike.  You will always be in my heart and thoughts.

Rest in Peace Karene.

Mass Effect 2 Follow Up: Miranda's a Bitch

Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Currently Playing: Mass Effect 2 (PS3)

So I'm a little late jumping onto the Mass Effect band wagon, and I have to say that I'm sorry that it took this long for it to happen.

Mass Effect 2 is quite possibly one of the best games I have ever played ever.

 I will be the first to say that if a game involves guns, I am going to suck at it.  Period.

I went into this game right around the same time I went and saw Chronicle with my friends, and figured that for $20 it was worth a shot. (Lame pun unintended.)

It really kind of has everything going for it: a really involved storyline that keeps you interested, a cast of really interesting characters, and a dynamic sense of gameplay that really keeps things moving along very effectively.

When you start the game you have the option of playing either a male or female Commander Shepard, and after going through a very brief and very "...did that really just happen?" opening sequence you are able to customize their looks.  And by customize their looks I don't mean "oh well this color is nice..." I mean legit warping the bone structure, skin tone/complexion as well as hair and eye color.  You then get the choice of what your base "class" is going to be.

Again, given my history with games with guns, I opted for the "Adept" class, meaning it was very heavily focused on biotics (what this game calls psionic powers) as opposed to heavy gun training.

Right from the start you're thrown into a demo level that helps you come to grips with your Shepard's unique talents against fairly inept enemies as you go charging through a space station filled with malfunctioning protection drones.

It's also right around that point that you realize that Martin Sheen, Seth Green and Steve Blum have all lent their voices to this game.  (Fun Fact: if you chose to play a female Shepard, the voice actress is the same voice actress as Avatar Kyoshi, among other fun roles).

Anyway, without divulging too much of the plot, stuff progresses, you round up your crew, and you go about trying to save the galaxy from ancient life destroying machines.

No Galactus...not you...

  On top of that the NPC crewsmen that kind of mill about doing stuff have full on conversations with one another from time to time, which gives the game a much more cinematic feel for it. The crew each have their own personalities and abilities, which make them all sorts of unique.  Take for instance Mordin Solus:

Not only is he a hyper-active doctor with a Ph.D. in Kicking Your Ass, he has a complicated back story involving biological warfare and questionable experimentation.  And just to round it out, he used to perform with an acting troupe.




Yeah. That just happened. (Love the little "...kaff" at the end).

So anyway, once you start unlocking character special abilities for your cohorts you can then add their abilities to your own, or if you so choose to start a new character you can pick one at character creation.

Go buy this game dear readers.  As much as I suck at shooting games I loved playing it.  Best of all, since I jumped in so late in the game Mass Effect 3 comes out this coming Tuesday so I don't have to wait at all very long before having to go out and spend more money I don't have to complete the epic saga.

Oh, and Shepard is a man whore, which I'm pretty sure you all already knew.

"If my stomach is Katy Perry then I'm going to fuck my stomach." Love dinner with my friends.

Fluttershy Cake

There come times when you simply just want to make a cake.

No other reason: you really just want cake.

So the other night I confessed my desire for confectionery deliciousness to my friend Allie and she too admitted that she wanted cake.  And so the great gears of scheming began to turn.

We discussed what type of flavors and ingredients we should use: whether it should be chocolate and fruit flavored or something simple yet very savory.  Ultimately we did decide on two things: it should be lemon and there should be strawberry something in it.

So having the day off, I began to plan this confectionery masterpiece: a lemon sponge cake would be good with swirls of strawberry sponge and maybe fresh strawberries in between the layers.  But no: that would net us far too much extra batter...although cupcakes could be made with the extra.  No no no...must focus on the task at hand.

And then, I had a crazy thought:  Why don't you use strawberry rum with the lemon sponge?

No brain!  That is far too insane to be effective!  The extra liquid would gooefy the whole thing!

Putting the thoughts aside I went to visit Allie at the library where she works and together we planned out our creation while she reshelved her stock.

That is...until she fell silent.  "Why don't we use the strawberry rum in the lemon cake?"

There is no way this was not cosmic interference that the two of us should come to the same decision.  I immediately drove home to make the preparation while she finished out her day at work and gathered the materials I did not have readily available.  She arrived and immediately we set to work.

And because I have all 4 of my loyal readers in mind, I decided to catalog the whole thing with my camera.

So dear readership, I present to you...

Strawberry Rum Lemon Cake with Raspberry Icing

Step 1: Gather the Ingredients

You will need:

• 1 box of Lemon Cake Mix
• 1/3 cup of Vegetable Oil
• 1 cup water
• 1/3 cup Bacardi Dragonberry Rum
• 1 shot Cruzan's Cherry Rum
• 3 eggs
• 6 Tbsp raspberry syrup
• 1 container white frosting

Step 2: Preheat Oven and Mix ingredients
Set the oven to 350 degrees and begin mixing the mix, oil, water, eggs and rum.

Dramatic dripping!

The batter should be consistently creamy and smell fairly strongly of rum in all of it's sickeningly sweet delicious glory.  If you're feeling adventurous (like we were) add in an extra shot of the Dragonberry.

Step 3: Pour it and Bake it
Pour the batter into two pre greased and floured pans...

Pam Baking: grease and flour in one conveniently lazy spray.

...and stick those bad boys in the oven.  They should bake for about 30 minutes or so: spend your time wisely.  We spent our making and eating omelets.

Oh God...our oven is disgusting...

Step 5: Prepare Icing
While the cake bakes, it might be a good idea to prepare your icing.  For ours, we used the entire can of plain white diabetes in a can and added in 4 Tbsp of the raspberry syrup and a small dose of red food coloring to get us that nice pastel pink (because without the food coloring it looked like flesh).

MORE DRAMATIC DRIPPING!

Step 6: Trim
After removing the cake from the oven, let sit in pan for at least 15 minutes before transferring it to a wire cooling rack.  Once on the rack, slice off the top bubble of cake from the surface so you have a nice, flat surface to work with once you start frosting it.

Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you look at it), the cake was still kind of warm when we removed the top layer of sponge, so it kind of looked like something out of CSI.  We affectionately named ours "face cake".

Step 7: Frosting

Now comes the fun part.  Once the sponge has sufficiently cooled down, place one layer on a plate and cover with a thin layer of icing before stacking on the second layer.  Once the top layer is in place, go around the whole cake, liberally applying the icing as you go until you get a nice coverage of the whole cake.  

At this point, we had covered the whole cake and looked and gazed upon it with splendor.  Then we looked at the bowl of frosting with a small sense of despair because we still had a goodly sized portion of it left and not enough cake to cover it with.  

It was then the inspiration hit.  I added 2 more Tbsp of the raspberry syrup to the remaining frosting and then a shot of Cruzan's cherry flavored rum.  Just to differentiate it from the rest of the icing on the cake already, I added in a not insignificant amount of red food coloring to turn it a bright magenta.  This turned the icing very fluid.

...exactly as planned.  I then poured the icing right into the center of the cake, and with a little coaxing from a chopstick pushed it down off the edges so it drizzled and ran down the sides.

The result was this:

It may not be entirely pretty to look at, but damn was I proud of it.  It was exactly at that moment where I went:  "My God...we made Pinkie Pie."  My parents were more than just a little confused by this statement until Allie undid her sweater and used her help MLP tee-shirt as a reference.  Dad rolled his eyes as per usual while Mom burst out laughing at our childish childish ways.

With great haste we sliced into this cake and lo did the frosting flow.  The more fluid magenta icing on the top flowed down into the slices as we made them and melded with the lemon flavored sponge below.  

At first bite the flavors all swam together.  The sweet tangy lemon danced with the subtle kiss of strawberry on its lips, all the while wearing a delicate pink gown of raspberry with the mildest hint of cherry.  It was at that moment we had a realization.

Yellow cake.

Pink frosting flowing gently.

Shy flavors that do a delicate dance of shy wonder.

We hadn't made Pinkie Pie...we had made:

I am damn proud of the cake my friend and I have made.  I'd offer you a slice, but you know...it's not like the internet is a series of tubes or anything like that right?

...right?.

Some guy in a full business suit came up to me at my counter and very properly asked "Do you have a crapper?" Excuse me...what?

Chronicle

So, I went to the movies for the first time since August to see Chronicle with a few friends.

Just walking into the theater reminded me why I started to dislike going to the theaters in the first place: the teenagers who think they're hot shit because they're out by themselves without parental supervision seeing a PG-13 rated movie.  I'll admit I was one of them at one point.  But here's the key difference: I knew when to shut the fuck up and let people around me watch the movie.

To emphasize-
The kids sitting in front of  us were a surly little group of 5 boys, none of them possibly older than 14.  One of them kept turning around prior to the credits and asking us questions, which can be fine under the right circumstances.  However, when I lean over to my friend and say "I want a slushie, do you guys want anything?" and this little shit turns around and says "Can I come with you?" when you start to head out, that's when it starts to border on creepy.  Not seeing any harm in it my friend and I reply "Sure, if you want to." but he remains firmly planted with his shitty friends.

So we go to the concession stand, get our overpriced movie snacks, and head back to the theater and into our seats, only to have the shit in question look back at us and say "Why wouldn't you let me come with you?"- it was at that moment when I knew shit was about to get real. 

The entire time during the credits he kept turning around and asking us ridiculous questions, obviously trying to annoy us, but I tried to take it in stride and giving equally as snarky responses in kind.  Eventually they turned their attention away from us and started to throw popcorn and Skittles at one another until the original shit stood up in his seat and proceeded to climb over it and into our row, sitting down next to me.  He kept leaning over and trying to work our nerves more until I just eventually ignored him.  It was only after we were in threat of getting shit thrown in my general vicinity did the child move back to his original seat and calm down a bit.

That is until he turned around and asked us "Do you guys think I'm annoying?"  I slowly turned my head toward him and as a group, my friends and I all replied "Yes."  to which he obviously got a little shaken and apologized.  That is until his next statement.

"I'm in special ed."

Really?  Really little shit child?  You're going to play that card?  ADHD does not qualify sympathy from me.

So I focused on playing the ignoring game as hard as possible until he finally silenced up.

That is until he turned around again saying "Have you seen my wallet?  My wallet's missing.  Did you take my wallet?  Look at me and tell me you didn't take my wallet."

My response:

Because I suddenly became an owl in that moment.

There was the small sound of one sanity snapping as I fixed my cold stare upon him.  "Okay...." and actually fell totally silent and rigid for about 15 minutes.

Right.  The movie.

The movie follows a group of teenagers in their senior year of high school: the popular kid, the school president and the misunderstood loner (effectively the main character) as they go to a party, discover some bizarre thing and develop psychic powers.  The next hour or so is dedicated to these guys goofing around and developing their strength as they go off and hit the town pranking people with their bizarre abilities.

So pretty much every high school student's dream.

Bent silverware and all.

I'm not going to delve any deeper into the plot since today WAS indeed opening night and all 12 of you readers out there might actually go and see it.  But what really sets this movie apart is the pseudo first-person camera that has been making a recent uptrend in cinema as of late.  I say pseudo because the movie actually references the cameras that are shooting it, starting from the big shoulder mounted camera that the loner starts out with and eventually into the handheld digital camcorder and iPhones/iPads of onlookers later on.  It's sort of like the movie is acknowledging that it is indeed a movie, however it almost comes across as slightly more documentary because they literally do at one point go "Alright shut up guys, I want to get this on camera."  They even give excuse to the cinematic angles and effects by making it a point to show that psychic loner can telekinetically float the camera over his shoulder.

Unfortunately no images for that yet.

But still, I really think it was a great movie and had several Akira-esque moments and motifs in it (giant mutant baby excluded).  Go see it if you can, I know I kind of want to go again myself.

However probably a matinee if anything so as to try and avoid the shitty children.

I just remembered why I don't see movies in theaters anymore- the obnoxious little teenagers in front of us just helped to stir my memory.

Big Girls: please do not wear jeggings.  I understand that you want to look sexy and feel empowered about your body but please no.  Just...no.

I am a Brony

There.

I said it.

I can already feel your scorn...

I'll admit it took a little while to get into it, what with the fact that I'm 23, male, and to be perfectly honest the concept of a redone series based on My Little Pony did not appeal to me in the least.  Of course that didn't stop most of the population from giving it a shot and loving every second of it.  My friend Joe was one of the worst offenders.  Every time we'd get together for D&D he'd be all about the freaking ponies and what ridiculous adventures they got themselves into over the course of their 20 some-odd minute run; all of them involving sunshine and rainbows and unicorn farts.

This concept of "Friendship is Magic" confuses and ENRAGES LRRR!

One day though, I figured I'd actually take a moment to give it a shot rather than chastise it and pass judgement without actually having taken at least a tiny bit of a dip into the pool.

At the end of that episode I was hooked.

I really enjoy that they actually took time to develop the characters behind each of the mane ponies, still keeping them vaguely two-dimensional as any children's program but actually giving them a history and room to change and grow.  The animation style actually really appealed to me for some reason, despite being fairly simplistic in it's colorization and shading (or lack thereof).

One thing that actually really got me though was the story telling.  At points: yes- the stories were incredibly trite and I could honestly see where the plot was going from miles away (again though, it's a children's show).  But at other points, the actual approach to the story at hand was kind of phenomenal.  They approached the ideas of westward expansion in one episode as a...herd?...of ponies moved into a prairie town and started to plant their apple trees on the sacred stampeding ground of a tribe of native buffalo, leading to all sorts of hostile confrontation but coming to a peaceful resolution at the end.

And only 1 obnoxious musical number from Pinkie Pie!

It took a lot of guts to approach my friend Joe after making fun of his pony obsession and apologizing for how wrong I had been.  Since then, a group of my friends have all pretty much become Bronies and Pegasisters in our own rights.  Hell even this past Wednesday booze-and-movie night, we spent a large part of Captain America and Hellboy II coloring in pages from a MLP coloring book that my friend Allie purchased on a whim at Costco.

Nothing says "Art Major" more than shading with crayons.

Ah...the fruits of our mildly intoxicated labors...

I am kind of proud on how the shading came out though I have to admit...especially since it means that I may or may not have put in more effor than the show's creators.

Check out General Zoi's Deviantart page for the full version Pony creator.  All the credit goes to her for her marvelous creation that allowed me to turn myself into a unicorn up at the top here.

I swear to shit, if I have to hear "Rolling in the Deep" one more time I might have to hurt someone.

Don't Censor the Net

I know this is kind of old hat at this point, but I'm sort of guilty of ignoring it until very recently.

Our government wants to pass certain bills that will (paraphrased) "make a good run at trying to stop online trafficking of copyrighted material and end internet piracy".  All well and dandy, but...at what cost?

SOPA

SOPA,  or the Stop Online Piracy Act, was introduced late in October 2011.  "The bill expands the ability of U.S. law enforcement and copyright holders to fight online trafficking in copyrighted intellectual property and counterfeit goods."¹

PIPA

"The Act protects individual privacy by requiring, in most cases, private-sector organizations to obtain consent for the collection, use and disclosure of personal information and providing individuals with a right of access to their own personal information."¹

What it actually means

Here’s what the government can do to foreign websites under even the most narrow reading of SOPA section 102 and PIPA section 3:

1. Order internet service providers to alter their DNS servers from resolving the domain names of websites in foreign countries that host illegal copies of videos, songs, and photos.
2. Order search engines like Google to modify search results to exclude foreign websites that host illegally copied material (ie hand pick what internet you see)
3. Order payment providers like PayPal to shut down the payment accounts of foreign websites that host illegally copied material (just like they did for pirate bay & ATDHE.net).
4. Order ad services like Google’s AdSense to refuse any ads or payment from foreign sites that host illegally copied content.

¹

For reference:
Let's say I write an entry here on Adventures of a Self Proclaimed Nerd and I include a picture that I obtained from a third party. 

Oh gee...not like I've ever done that before...

²

These acts could view these images as pirated material and block my website.  However, it would only really block out my page, but not my URL which seems kind of counter-productive in the grand scheme of things as it's only censoring my material rather than eliminating it from the web.

As a member of the internet generation (granted I didn't get the internet in my house until senior year of high school), I feel like it's my duty to stand against these acts.  Don't you?

Join the cause, fight against PIPA and SOPA!

Wikipedia is blacking out their pages for 24 hours in protest, and giving you a means to contact your legislators to let them know you are opposed to it.  Google is also generating an online petition.  It literally takes 5 minutes to call your legislators and sign the petition.  Hell, even StumbleUpon is getting in on this!

Don't let the net go dark.

Here's a list of other websites going dark in protest of these acts.

Games in Review: Skyward Sword

The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword was quite possibly one of my favorite games to play.  Admittedly, I'm a bit of a late comer to the Zelda franchise with my first game played to completion being Windwaker and about 3/4 of Majora's Mask under my belt I jumped into Twilight Princess last summer.  The visuals of Twilight Princess were some of the best that I've played in a while, although I found the colors just a touch flat and brownish, because if VG Cats has taught me anything it's that "brown is real".

But anyway, Skyward Sword is in effect, a prequel to most of the other Zelda games by establishing various points of the franchise such as:

The birth of the eternal princess

The origin of the Master Sword (aka: GLaDOS' cousin)

The reuniting of The Triforce

In that respect, I have to give it a lot of credit.  The motionplus technology works phenomenally with the overall game play aspect, really causing the player to think about how to actually go about attacking rather than swinging wildly.

The visuals are like something out of a watercolor painting: the further things are from the player, the more splotchy and impressionistic they become and gradually come into focus as they get nearer.  The character designs are incredibly tight too, keeping with the "realism" they established in Twilight Princess and borrowing every so slightly from the cartooniness of Windwaker to establish a new style of it's own.

However, there were points where it sort of got frustrating: particularly when the standard enemies in the dungeon became more difficult than the boss.  When I first encountered the Skultula I died possibly 3 times before figuring out how to actually kill it.  But to it's credit, the items you collect actually carry relevance throughout the game instead of for a dungeon and a half.  I also really enjoyed that it brought in a few aspects of slightly more expansive RPG's in that you can actually collect items from dead monsters as well as bugs and  use them to upgrade your equipment and potions.  The sidequests alone can keep people occupied for hours.

Overall I really enjoyed this game.  The one major downside I can find with being done with it is that I accidentally erased my original save data when prompted to start "Hero Mode".  I'd recommend this game to anyone with a Wii, beginner or veteran because it really is just pure fun.

A bit of late night epiphany

So this evening I was unlucky enough to get the closing shift, punching out at 11:45pm.  Equally as unlucky was the fact that the only available spot was in the next parking lot down by the Home Depot (which for those of you unfamiliar with the Palisades Center is kind of a long hike involving much traffice and what seems like an endless forest that in reality is more like 30 square feet).

Did I mention it's also 19 degrees and very windy?

So after hiking down to my car from the now empty lot, I was understandably in a less than cheery mood.  Getting into my car and cranking up the heat, it was then I noticed that I was critically low on gas, meaning that there was no way in the now apparently frozen over pits of hell that I was going to make it home without getting gas first.  It now being midnight and realizing that for whatever reason gas stations around here close around 10, I got just a touch less cheery.

Luckily though, I did manage to find a 24 hour, $3.89/gallon station right near the mall, and my spirits began to lift a little.  Until I realized that for whatever reason (current speculation is that my car has a bend in the gas line) takes forever-and-a-fucking-half to fill up.  All that wonderful warmth that I had just begun to feel was slowly seeping out from my fingertips apparently, because they were numb before I even got out of the car.

With gas in the car, heat cranked up and feeling slowly returning to my extremities, I headed home.  The ride home was fairly uneventful, save for some of the more colorful language I used towards the other drivers who apparently decided that up their collective asses was the best place to put their heads while they drove instead of watching the road.  But I digress.

It was when I was nearly home that I happened to look out of the passenger side window and caught a glimpse of one of the forest lakes that pepper the area around here, and noticed the beautiful way that the moon was reflecting across the surface of the water through the trees.  The lake became a glowing beacon in the night, caged off from the rest of the world by the skeletal arms of the trees that surround it almost as if trying to protect it from the frigid darkness that pressed in from every direction.

It was then that I realized that no matter how shitty a day goes or how cold and dark the night becomes, there is always something out there that can help alleviate the weight of the day even if only for just a brief moment: and sometimes you only need look out your window to happen upon it by chance.

Now I should really get to bed.  I have to open the store tomorrow after all.

With a Little Help From My Friends

Yeah, bit of a cliche title but, as I've been described before, I'm apparently a master of the cliche.

These past few months or so have been a bit hard to tolerate at points.  Both from my own perspective and from the perspective of others.  Yet the one thing that I'm truly grateful for when these harsh times come up is my wonderful group of friends.

For example:
Last month my cat Drake went missing, and the next day we found him outside our house with his neck broken and frozen through.  He was my little man, a huge part of my world and I was absolutely devastated when we found him (made all the more soul crushing by the fact that he was only 2 years old).

My Little Man: Sir Admiral Drake Cake

So what happened after the fact?
Despite being in an absolute weepy mess for days and weeks afterwards, my friends all rose up to try and comfort me.  My phone was literally exploding with text messages of "we should go hang out" or "let's go watch a movie or something" for the weeks afterwards in an attempt to bring my mind off of the tragedy that had rocked my family.  I think one of the particular events that helped the most was when a few of my friends went out, grabbed a bottle of Captain Morgan (ironically the name of Drake's sister) and we put on shitty movies from Netflix as we laughed and berated the movie the entire time.

Drake's litter sister: Lady Captain Morgan

In time the hurt of it diminished enough and the overwhelming warmth of the friendship that I was getting was enough to really help me get through it. 

Another example:
A friend of mine recently ended a relationship with her boyfriend of a few years.  Much to her misfortune she also had her driving test the next day.  Luckily she managed to pass the driving test but you could tell she was still kind of down-in-the-dumps-y when we met up with her later that same day.  So, being the friends we are we went out for sushi (which despite being a vegetarian I will always make an exception for), grabbed a bottle of rum and put on more movies. 

I'm beginning to notice a trend here...

Point being though, without my friends there to lean on when I need to I don't know where I'd be right now.

Things I am a fan of: Horror Movies

Nothing quite gets me wide awake and creative like a good old fashion bought of terror.  Haunted houses, scary stories, whatever inexplicable horror this is; just that good old adrenaline pumping fear that gets your heart racing and mind going down dark alleyways with strangers with the promise of candy.

Unfortunately, a lot of horror movies coming out as of late aren't really all that scary.

Oh no, attractive girl in her underwear!  THE PURE ABJECT TERROR!

 The Unborn for instance, starts off with a fairly solid premise:

• Girl starts having weird dreams as her brown eyes turn blue
• Weird shit starts happening around her
• Demon child brought into this world as a Nazi experimentation on children tries to free itself through her by tearing through her uterus
• ???
• Profit!

Unfortunately, it falls flat in a lot of areas.  A lot of the actual creep factor was brought on by the special effects and lots of creatures with their heads on upside down.

This is scary, right?

Otherwise, a lot of the actual scare factor was brought on by shameless "jump scares" and even a mirror take or two.  All considering not all that scary, just...shocking more than anything.

Another movie in slightly more recent times was Drag Me to Hell.  Similarly, it had good promise to it:

• Girl is working at bank but is reprimanded by her superiors to stop being so nice
• Old Granny Gypsy comes in begging for an extension on her loan payments
• Girl grows a pair and says "no"
• Old Granny Gypsy hides out in girl's car and ambushes her on the way home (physically)
• Old Granny Gypsy places curse on girl
• Girl is haunted by evil demon that will ~lo-and-behold~ drag her to Hell in a few days!
• ???
• Profit?

Pictured: The best scene in the whole movie.

Even the movie poster has solid intentions!  It very clearly shows you exactly what you're in for: some sort of evil force dragging an attractive young woman into the depths of Hell!  However, the build up to that point in the movie is nigh insufferable, relying mostly on more jump scares and loud sound effects to frighten you rather than solid plot and development.  The whole thing just leaves the viewer to question what they just spent the past hour and so minutes wasting their life on.

Turning away from movies I wasn't fond of: Paranormal Activity made me afraid to sleep with any of my limbs hanging out of the covers for weeks after viewing it.  Hell even now I make sure that my comforter is wrapped around me as tight as it will go to make sure that some invisible phantasm doesn't grab me by the leg and drag me down the hallway.  The thing that I think makes this movie most scary is the fact that you don't see what is going to destroy you're sanity: it preys upon the fear of the unknown and turns your own imagination against you.

Pictured: Your worst nightmare come to life.

Another one that geninuely creeped me out was Quarantine.  It takes the idea of the zombie and translates it away from the idea of a reanimated corpse by turning it into an actual living creature brought on by a horrible disease, much like the 28 Days Later franchise did.  I think that's what makes this movie so scary: that these creatures are still living people who you knew and lived with that want to violently tear you limb from limb to satiate their ravenous hunger and disease induced rage.

Which kind of brings me to one of the things in most recent times is Marble Hornets.  It's a youtube series that is done as a series of entries based on video tapes previously recorded and now being watched in a retrospective manner while the main character tries to piece together a complicated web of lies revolving around his one friend.

Oh...and he's in it too...

Yeah.  Something about Slender Man scares the ever-loving bejesus out of me.  I know he's not an actual enitity, but...something about a shapeshifting abomination that steals the sanity of its victims before possibly disemboweling and/or eating them in his own pocket dimension strikes JUST the right nerve to keep me awake at night.  Marble Hornets actually does a really solid job of keeping him just in the background of many of the shots, drawing attention to him only when you absolutely need a good pants wetting.  Their erstwhile nemesis totheark is nothing to snuff at either.

 

You know what you did.

So, as I wrap this up at 12:30 at night in a hundred year old house set out in the woods under the light of a nearly full moon, I plan on wrapping myself up in as many blankets as possible and set myself down for a good, long night of not sleeping out of all the fear I just stirred up in my own mind.

Thanks me.

Adventures at Target Part I

Now don't get me wrong, I do actually enjoy my job.  It's just that some times things get very..."trying" we'll say.  If it's not the huge piles of "push" (items to stock out) or ridiculous "procedures" (daily maintenance protocols) being pushed by managers that no one bothered to train me on, it's mostly the guests: because we're Target and we treat our customers so well that they aren't customers because they are welcomed guests in our place of business dammit.

Today was especially something to behold.  Despite being a Tuesday afternoon, the guests we had today were a breed all their own.  For instance, here's a conversation between myself and one guest:

Myself: Hi there, can I help you find something?
Guest: Yes, I'm looking for car radios.
Myself: I haven't seen anything like that here, but we can take a look.
Guest: I've seen them here before.
Myself: Hmm...well ~thinking to myself 'NOPE!'~ we can take a look over here, but if anything I feel like they'd be down in Automotive.
Guest: Oh I know.

Myself: 
Guest: Which way is it?
Myself: Oh it's...that...way...~points her off in the right direction~
Guest: Thank you!

Or perhaps another that happened to the cellphone girl:

Cell Girl: Hi there, can I help you find something?
Guest: Do all the phones just sit there like that?
Cell Girl: Like how sir?
Guest: Don't they have a cover?
Cell Girl: Well...no...they do sell cases for them separate from the phone.
Guest: No!  I don't want a case for it!  I want a cover!
Cell Girl: Sir, I'm not sure I follow what you're asking for?

Conversation continues as such for several more minutes

Guest: A cover!  Just like this one! ~picks up a flip phone~

Cell Girl: Uhm...

Yeah.   Just part one of an ongoing series that I'm hoping to continue as I continue working here.  Just one adventure out of many.

Currently Playing: Dark Souls (PS3)

I just recently made full use of my employee discount at Target in tandem with one of the post-Christmas sales to purchase myself a Playstation 3 with my Christmas money.  Admittedly, probably not the most responsible use of my money considering I have payments to make and other monetary things to worry about; but nuts to all of that it was my Christmas money and I was going to spend it how I damn well pleased.  And besides, when you have the opportunity to get the 320GB PS3 with the Playstation Move WITH a free $75 giftcard for roughly $286, you don't really pass that up.

So right, Dark Souls.  This game so far has proved to be nothing but frustrating in the best kind of way.  The general premise of the game entails something to the effect of the world dying out and the undead being on the rise.  At least that's what I've gathered from the opening movie thus far.  As such, you play as one of said undead in an attempt to reclaim your humanity by vanquishing other undead monstrosities and demons, thus consuming their souls.

I'm still fairly early on into the game, despite having ground my way up to level 30 and still yet to face the third boss; but so far this game is all sorts of fun.  In the early portion of the game, you select your character's base class (ranging from warrior to sorcerer and even the "I'm broke as balls so I literally get no armor or weapons PERIOD" classes), starting item and then customize the ever-loving crap out of their appearance...only to start off the game in some sort of undead asylum all shriveled up and looking like a walking humanoid pile of beef jerky.  You then proceed to break out of the asylum, killing undead along the way and ultimately coming face to face with the draconic jailer before a giant raven wisks you away to the forgotten realm of kings and lords so you can...do...stuff...

Yeah...they were kind of vague on the "why" of it.  Something about a chosen undead or something?

You then proceed to explore this ancient land by first making your way through an undead city, which apparently was all nice and peaceful until you showed up to murder every unliving thing in sight.

The game itself gets fairly repetitive in that you can rest at a bonfire and all the enemies (save for bosses or other dumb-hard foes) will reset, allowing you to go back and kill them all again, gaining more and more souls.  While that particular level of grinding can be fun for a while it super blows when you're fighting a boss after having cleared out a whole dungeon area and die, forcing you to go back and re-clear the dungeon.  Oh.  And when you die your body becomes a bloodstain that contains all the souls you had prior so you have to go and reclaim them lest you lose out on all of them.

"Please great lords...give me the patience to re-murder everything I layeth mine eyes upon."

The game does let you go off and adventure around, explore the lands as you go which gives you a bit more a freehand playing experience.  Well pretty much after clearing out the first boss that is.  The enemies in these areas are pretty stacked against you though, so it does kind of attempt to reign you into following a pattern of play.  However, if you're willing to take the risk and plunge into these areas before you're ready the souls the enemies bestow upon you can prove to be incredibly helpful.

Overall I really enjoy this game.  The graphics are awesome, the gameplay itself is challenging and I like that it's a fantasy RPG that isn't at all puzzle heavy and focuses almost entirely on combat.  I also really enjoy that you're not married to whatever class you chose at the beginning; by spending enough souls you can basically build your character into whatever you want it to be.  I started off as a Sorcerer so I could start the game with magic at my disposal, but have since branched out into dexterity and weapon capabilities to be a kick-ass archer/backstabber to supplement my magical prowess.  I'd highly recommend this game to all you seasoned gamers out there: definitely not a game for beginners.

New Introductions

I'm not exactly a stranger when it comes to the idea of a blog.  In fact, I've probably started more blogs than I'd care to acknowledge and simply lost interest in them because slowly but surely they all became a front for me to sit there and whine about one thing or another.

But just like the abusive ex who keeps trying to win you back "this time I'll be different, I swear!"  Primarily I'm thinking that I want to use this blog as a sort of springboard for ideas while I just explore my own world from day to day, both in the metaphysical sense and in the literal sense.

I suppose I should maybe introduce myself first though now shouldn't I?

My name is Tom (in case you hadn't already seen the "about me" section), I'm a recent college graduate from The College of Saint Rose with a Bachelors of Science in Photography, and on a near weekly basis I play Dungeons and Dragons with my friends.  I enjoy reading (primarily fantasy) and going out on adventures with said friends, however since moving home as my student debt continues to accrue higher and higher interest my adventures have since kind of become stagnant adventures to the mecca of consumeristic glee: The Palisades Center.  Similarly, I'm putting myself back to school at Rockland Community to earn a certificate in web development through my earnings at my winter job (electronics at Target, which so far has brought me nothing but entertainment).

I, like most artists probably say, use my artwork and gaming as a way to put into existence the jumbled thoughts that go through my head.  Things that appear so vividly to me in my mind just begin begging to be released into the real world.  Unfortunately whenever I do get them out into the real world the effects are incredibly lack luster, much like Ira Glass says about most beginners starting out in their creative fields.  The glory of being a beginner though, is that eventually you stop being one and become a pro at it.  I really anticipate that day when I stop being a beginner and someone finally tells me "yes, this is it: you are indeed a pro at what you do". 

...oddly enough I thought that day would be the day I got my diploma buuuuuuut....apparently not the case.

So follow me if you'd like.  I'll actually try to make a concerted effort to actually post on a regular basis instead of posting with the fury for a few weeks then losing interest in it and never looking back.

Alternatively you can follow my long time friend Adam Lopez on his blog, "Things I Am Not".  Or you know...you can follow us both...it's cool.  Just saying is all.